By wallaceb Ron: Oh, man KP, look at this line. We’ll never make it into Bricks of Fury I-I-I. Kim: I-I-I. Ron, that’s the Roman numeral 3. Ron: Un-uh, yea, Latin and math are not my strongest subjects. There was a time when… AHH! The line is moving! Kim: I don’t get the drama. If you’ve seen one movie about a disgruntled security guard who enacts his own brand of street justice using a cinder block, you’ve seen them all. Ron: Psshha. These ones got 30 percent more bricks. Kim: Pshha. And I’ve got 30 percent more don’t care. Ron: Come-on, catch up KP. I’m going to snag those seats. Coming through! Excuse me! Pardon me! OWW! Pardon me! Excuse me! Boo-yea! Seats are secured. Kim? How’d you? Kim: Walked around. Ron: Now to claim what’s rightfully mine. Ha! That’s right little missy! I got the elbow dibs on the armrest. Kim: Stress much? Ron: Welcome to the jungle KP. Be right back. Kim: You just got here. Ron: Snackage! Hello! Want anything? Popcorn? Soda? Jelly-Jumpies?
Rufus: Jumpies! Kim: I’m cutting down on the Jumpies. Dash: Kim Possible, your teen hero days are over and out Crash: This film has been terminated. Burn: Audience leaves now!
Crowd: Ahhh. Kim: Hey! Crash: You keep it parked. Kid: Hey, I paid nine seventy five for this movie. Crash: Give him the fork. Kid: The what? Kim: What? No stun-spoon? Crash and Burn: She knows about the spoon! Kim: Umm… joking. Burn: You are a bag of trouble, aren’t you? Ron: So did everyone go for popcorn? Hey! Down in front. Who are these guys? Team Impossible: Team Impossible! Ron: KP! They have a theme song. Why don’t we have a theme song? You know, it could be like, you know like ba-ba-ba-ba or bamp-bamp-bamp, you know like my pants fall down, you know like we could put something in. Burn: The fork? Crash: The fork. Kim: Uhhh… do we know you? Dash: Dash Deman. Surveillance and recon. Ron: Wow. Theme song and clips. Dash: Extreme wilderness survival specialist. Learned in seven languages and countless dialects. Crash: Crash Cranston. Transport and tech. Professional dare devil. Also, skilled in emergency medicine. Burn: Burn Burnmen. Certified public accountant. Ron: That’s it? Burn: Numbers are not the only thing that I crunch squirt. Ron: Good to know. Kim: Yea, hi, can we get to the why you’re here part now? Dash: Team Impossible is the premiere action and rescue team worldwide. Kim: No offence, but I’ve never heard of you guys. Dash: Oh, haven’t you? I think I can refresh your memory. Ron: Hey, it’s that guy. What was his name? No, now wait, don’t tell me. Kim: Paisley. Our first big time rescue. Ron: Oh, I was thinking of someone else. Dash: Mr. Paisley was an avid collector of cuddle buddies. Kim: He had a flamingoat. They only made… Dash: Ten. Yes, we know. To protect his collection, he installed a McHenry laser grid. The best money can buy. But Paisley got himself into a situation. Crash: We get people out of situations. Kim: Actually, we got him out of that sitch-uation. Dash: Yes, we know. Burn: You see we have a website... Kim: I have a website! Dash: Yes, we know. Crash: Paisley needed us, but thanks to careless typing he got you. Ron: So our first mission was because of a typo? Kim: But it worked out in the end. See, I used my cheer skills… Dash: Guess what? Kim: You know? Dash: Yea. Kim: Ok, so if you know it all, what do you want from us? Burn: Your little teen adventures have cut into our profit margin. Big time! Kim: But I don’t charge to help people. Burn: And that’s the problem. Dash: You’ve had your kicks, now leave the hero business to the professionals. Crash: Stay in school. Ron: Man that is a good theme. Kim: Ron, they want us to just stop. Ron: I know KP. I don’t have to like them to like their theme. Mrs. Possible: Hon, why don’t you hire a professional? Mr. Possible: Urgg, I’m a rocket scientist. I should be able to do my own taxes. Now, let’s see. Last name. Possible . First Name. Kim: Dad? Mom? Mr. Possible: Kimmie? Mrs. Possible: Is something wrong? Kim: I don’t know. Somebody wants to put me out of business. Mrs. Possible: What business? Kim: The world saving business! Mr. Possible: I thought that was more of a hobby. Kim: Whatever, to Team Impossible it’s a business. Serious business. Mrs. Possible: Team Impossible? Mr. Possible: Who’s that? Kim: Jerks! They help people, but for money. And they’re so smug about it. Mr. Possible: Ewww! Smug really pushes my peev button Mrs. Possible: What are you going to do? Kim: Sometimes I think it would be way easier if I just lived life like a normal teenager. Mr. Possible: Now Kimmie, you are not normal. You are a Possible. Jim: We’re making anti-matter in the garage. Tim: Hooshaa! Mrs. Possible: What your father means honey… Kim: I know what he means mom. And he’s right. Save the world! It’s what I do and nobody’s going to stop me. Thanks guys. Mr. Possible: Ewww! First Name? urgg You know what, I’m calling an accountant. Ron: Ok, let’s see. Puppy sitter wanted. That sounds cute and fun. Oh, right. Forgot about the fetch incidence. Balding men needed for scientific study. Hmm
Rufus: No! Ron: Ok, ok, ok. But I think you’re passing up an opportunity to give something back. Maybe a hobby. OH! I know! I can watch TV until my eyes burn. Bam! Problem solved. Kim: What’s going Ron? Ron: Hey KP. Na, I figured since we dropped out of the hero biz I had better find something to do with all my new free time. Kim: Who said we were dropping out? Ron: Uhh… the three big dudes with the super cool theme song. Can’t get it out of my head. Kim: Just because those greedy goons think we’re cutting into their bottom line, that’s no reason to quit. Ron: No. How about because they have a half a dozen fists. Kim: Go Wade. Wade: Red Alert Kim. Drakken is at his alpine lair and he’s going to test his new avalancher on a little Swiss village. Kim: And the avalancher? Wade: Uses sub-harmonics to create avalanches. Kim: Well, that was my guess. We’re a go! Wade: Ok, I set you up with Bernice to get you to Switzerland, then your old friend Hindrick will meet you at the airport. Ron: You know Wade, if the super-genius-computer-dude thing ever dries up, you’d make a bond-diggity travel agent. Wade: Nah, I’d have to leave my room. Kim: Thanks for the lift again Bernice. Bernice: As long as you help people, people are happy to help you Kim. Kim: Hmm… and without a theme song. Ron: Oh, come on. It would be a plus and you know it. K, so where’s our ride? Kim: Wade, update. Any word from Hindrick? Wade: What? Hindrick should have been there an half-hour ago. I’ll check. In the meantime, how do you feel about riding on a tour bus full of seniors? Ron: Seniors? What’s the big? They’re only a year older than us. That’s cool. I guess he didn’t mean High School Seniors. Old Lady: I’m sorry, but since you were last minute additions to our group, we don’t have a boxed lunch for you two. Kim: Oh, that’s, that’s fine. Ron: Hold on Kim, we had to pay for this ride with our own money, we’re entitled to this lunch. Kim: It’s fine Ron! Ron: It has a cookie in it! Kim: Ron! Ron: Kim, I’m just saying fair is fair. Kim: Focusing now. Ron: And we paid for a visit to a charming cheese shop, and chocolate tasting. Chocolate tasting, Kim! I know buddy, but sometimes fighting the good fight means no chocolate. I want that boxed lunch! Kim: Let it go Ron. It’s Drakken time, not snacking time. Ron: NO WAY! They’re going on a coo-coo factory tour. Kim: So are we. Come on. What? Ron: Wow! Is this a coincidence or? Drakken: No! You can’t stop Dr… Oww! Swede: Team Impossible, thank you for saving our village. I don’t know how we could ever repay you. Dash: You’ll find a way. Our bill. Swede: Will you take a credit card? Crash: Check his credit score. Burn: He’s clean. Swede: Thank you and please accept this basket of chocolate and cheese as a small token. Drakken: Kim Possible. You think you’re all that, but they are! Ron: Told you we needed a theme song. Wade: Sorry Kim. I don’t know what happened. Kim: Hmm… Maximum strangeness. Ron: Oh! I got it all figured out. Kim: Our ride sitch? Ron: No, better! Kick it Rufus. Bam-bam-bamda-bam Kim: Ron, NO! Ron: Don’t decide yet Kim. All I’m saying is if we had a catchy theme, then we could start charging some claude. Kim: Claude? Ron: Monnee! Money! Cash! Kim: Some things are more important than money Ron. Ron: Ahh! Just shut me down with noble. Kim: Wade. Keep me posted on Hindrick. Probably nothing, but just in case. Wade: You got it Kim. Hang on, we got another hit. Kim: What’s the sitch? Wade: Professor Dementor stole a computer disc containing top secret hyper-technology. Ron: Hmm… that’s a bad sitch. Wade: Looks like he set up a stronghold on a remote island in the south Pacific. Kim: We’re there. Ron: No, we need a ride. Kim: No big Ron. We always get a ride. Wade, who do we have? Wade: Ok, this is unusual. We have three different likely and reliable rides in that region and… and they’re all missing. And now I can’t even reach Bernice. Kim: So we’ve got two problems. Dementor and the missing rides. Ron: Well, three problems if you count how do we get a ride to the south pacific to stop Dementor?. True, four problems if you count how do we get a ride to search for the missing rides? Cruise ship lady: It’s time for shuffleboard on the Lido deck. Who came to play? Ron: Who came to lose? Old Lady: Bring it! Ron: Hey, it’s you! Old Lady: That’s right! Kim: Let it go Ron. Ron: I want that boxed lunch! Wade: Sorry you had to actually buy tickets for a cruise, but at least I got you in the vicinity of Professor Dementor’s lair. Your jetpacks should have enough range to get you the rest of the way. Kim: This no ride thing, I don’t like it. Ron: Well, me neither. These two missions have officially tapped me out. Somebody still owes me a boxed lunch! Kim: I was referring to our friends that have vanished. Ron: Yes, ok, that’s bad too. Kim: Wade, while we foil Dementor, keep searching for our missing rides. Wade: I’m on it. Ron: How do you like bam-da-bam-da-bam Kim: RON! We do not need a theme song. Ron: Did it occur to you that it gives Team Impossible an edge? Kim: If they had an edge, which they do not. Dementor: You three are positively amazing. What gives you your edge? Kim: Don’t even! This was our mission. Dash: Key word was. The rightful owners of this disk were getting antsy, so they decided to pay us. Crash: And in addition to our base fee, we get a completion bonus and a premium for rush service. We’re talking serious claude. Ron: That’s a big number. Kim: How big? Ron: Nacho Royalty big. Dementor: Could we get on with this? My legs are cramping up. Dash: Team Impossible does not take orders from villains. Burn: Rush service premium. Dash: Team Impossible move out! Mr. Possible: Hello, is this Zzyssic Accounting? I was wondering if I could get some help with my taxes. Yes, I know it’s tax season, that’s why Look, I’m no rocket scientist, I mean, actually, I am, but hello? Kim: You ok dad? Mr. Possible: Too many numbers. How’s your crisis going Kimmie? Kim: Urgg… just as bad dad. Just as bad. Mr. Possible: Well, you know where to find me if you need me. I’m not going anywhere. Anywhere! Curse you tax-man! Kim: I’m getting worried. Wade: It looks like everyone who has ever given you a ride is now missing. Kim: everyone? Wade: Even some before I started running your site. Like some lady with a cat named Tabby. Kim: Mrs. Mahoney. Wade: That’s her. Who is she? Kim: She gave Ron and me a ride to our first mission. The first time we got the call instead of Team Impossible. Ron: Because of a typo. Wade: You think Team Impossible is behind the missing persons? Kim: They tell me to get out of the business. I say no. Suddenly my rides disappear, and I can’t get around the world anymore. Wade: And by the time you get to a mission, they’re already there. Ron: Getting paid. Kim: Ron! This is not about the money. Ron: It is for Team Impossible. Kim: Yea. Wade if we made a connection with Team Impossible’s website. Wade: Could I trace it? Shhyea! Ron: I don’t think they’re going to take a call from us. Kim: Not us, a rich guy in trouble. Ron: Umm, yes, Richie Richardson here and dash it all if I’m not wealthy. I’m in big dangerous expensive trouble and dash it all again if I don’t need overpriced help, mmm rather. Kim: Ok, that ought to do it. Wade: We’ll know soon if… Bam! Incoming transmission. Team Impossible’s Message: Team Impossible is responding to your call, please stay on the line for the next adventure and rescue representative, and have your credit card ready. Wade: Gotcha! Computer: Warning, unwanted cyber trace, unwanted cyber trace. Dash: Set and… Wade: Spike. Yea? Kim: We lost you. Everything ok? Wade: They spiked me. My whole system is fried. Kim: Everything? Don’t you have firewall thingies? Wade: Not anymore. Fried! Fried! Like popcorn chicken! Kim: Wade, I know this is a difficult time for you… Wade: Fried!!! Kim: But did you get a location? Wade: Yea… I’ll… mail it to you Ron: Snail mail!? Kim: Wade, just… uhhh… just read it to us. Ron: When you have the strength. Kim: Thanks for the lift Mrs. Silver. Mrs. Silver: Well, it’s the least I could do after I shorted you on the boxed lunch, and wiped the board with you at shuffle board. Kim: Oh, that’s more than a fair trade. Right, Ron? Ron: I guess. Kim: That’s it. Ron: Wow. Greed pays. Mrs. Silver: The three nicest boys live there. Do you want me to introduce you? Kim: Oh, no thanks, we’ll surprise them. Kim: Ready to hop the wall? Ron: Any idea what’s on the other side? Kim: I’m going with guard dogs. Ron: Yea, see, to me they don’t seem like dog people. I’m going to say robotic sentries. Kim: Only one way to find out. Ron: Is that Hindrick and Captain Louise in the hot tub!? Captain Louise: Hey, there she goes. Ahoy Miss Possible. Hindrick: Kim, small world. Ron: If this is what happens when Team Impossible captures you, I’m ready! Capture me! Bernice: Captured? This is an all expense paid vacation. Grab a fruit cup. Guy: And no television. No papers. No phones. It is as if the outside world does not exist. Kim: Oh, this doesn’t make sense. Dash: Of course it does. If it keeps you stuck in Middleton, it’s worth it. Burn: Ha, even if the all you can eat buffet, we’re still making a mint. Dash: As long as we get the missions. Crash: And you don’t. Dash: Were we too subtle? The cheerleader saves the world thing has gotten tedious. Its over. Forever! Dash: Bring Crash: It Burn: On! Kim: Oh, we’re ready. Right Ron? Ron: Uhh, yea, uhh, umm, define ready. Kim: You’re prepared to not get in the way. Ron: Oh, yea, ready. Oh these guys are weak. Rufus: Oh yea. Dash: Excuse me? Ron: Good work. You rule old school. Dash: I thought you were supposed to be some master of monkey kung-fu. Ron: You know, it’s funny. It comes and goes. Kim: Hey Dash. I’m waiting. Dash: I wish there was another way. Ron: Really? Dash: No. I’m told we should always say that for legal reasons. Burn: It shields us from liability. Kim: I think you need to worry about shielding yourself from me. Dash: So be it. Ron: Dude, you are so over. Dash: I can take her. Ron: No. Rufus: Sorry. Dash: Do you know what I’m capable of? Ron: I’ve got a general idea. Dash: And? Ron: Dude, you are so over. Dash: Let’s just see about that. Wade: Nobody. Nobody spikes my system. Kim: Wade?! Ron: Wade!? In person? Dude, now you are so over. I don’t even want to stand near you. Wow. You have really perfected the holo-Wade. Wade: It’s really me Ron. Ron: Yea right. If it were really you, I couldn’t do this. Dash: Team Impossible is the world’s greatest team of high danger operatives. We will not be intimated by children. Ron: You’re not helping yourself. Dash: I’m so not afraid. Ron: You should be. Wade: Remember Kim’s first mission? Kim: Ron, get over here. Quickly. Dash: It was supposed to be our mission. What else do I need to know? Wade: Does the McHenry laser grid ring a bell? Crash: Yea, it cost Paisley a fortune. Burn: So we had to have one too. Dash: Nothing but the best for Team Impossible. Wade: Whops. Look familiar? Kim: You rock even more in person wade. Ron: Somehow I thought you’d be shorter. Crash: Danger has been our closest friend but I’m not liking this. Burn: Nah, it’s easy enough to disable. Dash: Just hit that red button. Wade: One bad twitch and you’ll know what my fried system feels like. Ron: Ok, maybe he shouldn’t have left his room. Crash: What are you doing? Burn: Nobody could get that. Dash: It’s impossible. Kim: Nah, for you maybe. For me, well, we’ll see. Dash: It was actually possible that Team Impossible? Crash: Could have been fried Burn: That would have impacted our earning potential. Kim: Cheerleader saves the world thing doesn’t look so bad now, does it? Wade: Guys, you need to get wise. Ron: I think I know how to work this out. Gentlemen, this is the Naco. Dash: It looks like a taco in some nachos. Crash: All smashed together. Burn: Mmmm. Kim: So, do we have an understanding? Dash: Well, if by that you mean are we going to quit charging money to help people and join global justice as you suggested. Hard to say. Wade: Uhh, guys. Crash: Uhoh. Burn: You don’t have this place wired. Ron: Trust me on this, Wade has the world wired. Dash: Team Impossible is now non-profit. Burn: Which actually has some tax advantages. Kim: I’m proud of you guys. Ron: So with Team Impossible out of the picture… Kim: No, we will not start charging money for our missions. Ron: Ok, but just let me… Kim: Ohh, go ahead. Dad. Mr. Possible: Kimmie? Are you there? I can’t see anything but numbers! Oh. Kim: Help has arrived, Dad. Mr. Possible: Umm? Who’s the big guy? Kim: Burn Burnmen. Certified Public Accountant. Mr. Possible: And my hero. Kim: Well, it’s a start
