By wallaceb Bonnie: Too bad, Kim. I think we should complain to whoever came up
with that fussy routine. Oh, that was you, wasn't it? Kim: That fussy routine is going to win the regional’s tomorrow, Bonnie, if you can remember it. OK, again! From the top! Ron: Excuse me, Kim? Kim: Not now, Ron. Ron: Err, KP, kinda importante. Kim: Mucho busy. Ron: Gimme a K, gimme an I, gimme an M. What does that spell? Kim: Ron! Ron: Buzz! Sorry, but thanks for playing. Kim: What? Ron: You'll never guess who needs your help. Kim: Dr. Drakken? Dr. Drakken? Why? What? How?
Cleotis: I'm Private Cleotis Dobbs, United States Armed Forces. Ron: It's Drakken's evil twin. Kim: Ron, Drakken's already evil. Ron: OK, I'm confused. Cleotis in Darkken’s Body: This Drakken fella used some kind of big machine switched my brain with his. It wasn't natural. Kim: Wait. His brain is in your body? Cleotis in Darkken’s Body: I gotta go. The pretty girl that hits, she's a-coming. She's gonna… Kim: Wade! Wade: Working on it! Kim: Like its not bad enough the regional’s are tomorrow Now this extreme weirdness. Ron: Stress not, KP. You'll handle it. That's what you do. Kim: You make my life sound like cake. Ron: Let's see, you're smart, athletic, pretty and popular. Sounds pretty cakey to me. Kim: OK, flip mode. Playing video games, watching wrestling and downing snackage. It must be brutal being you. Ron: Try the demands of raising Rufus as a single parent. Not to mention the pressures of maintaining my image. OK, so I don't Exactly have an image yet, but I'm working on it. And frankly, It’s exhausting. Wade: Couldn't regain contact with Private Dobbs. Frequency's jammed. Kim: Background check? Wade: Everything is classified. The only thing I could dig up was this picture. Ron: I don't get it. Kim: Yeah. Why would Drakken wanna be in that body? Computer: Private Cleotis Dobbs. Identity confirmed. Kim: And on top of everything else, there's tutoring, swim team, the yearbook committee. Ron: Otherwise known as having a social life. Excuse me, I called ahead for the kosher meal. Kim: What's the sitch, Wade? Wade: I finally traced the call from the guy in Drakken's body. But it's weird. Kim: Weirder than a guy in Drakken's body? Wade: Good point. Anyway, it looks like the call came from the middle of the Grand Canyon. Kim: Thanks for the lift, Baxter. Baxter: My pleasure, little lady. Least I can do to pay You back for helping Buttercup in her time of need. Kim: That emergency delivery of her foal? Ron: In the dark. Baxter: In the rain. Ron: In a landslide. Kim: It was no big. Ron: Get along, little donkey! Get along! Whoa! Baxter: How about we trade? Buttercup here's a sweetheart. Ron: Oh, well, I mean, if you insist. Kim: This is it. Ron: That's Drakken's lair? Rufus, quit climbing up my leg. Rufus: Huh? Ron: Oh! Get off! Get off, get off! Whew! Ahhhhh! Kim: Mr. Dumb Luck. Ron: Not Dumb Luck, Kim. Dumb Skills. Rufus: Hmm, yeah! Ron: Have we been in this lair before? Kim: They all start to look alike after a while. Ron: Brain-switch machine, most definitely. Cleotis In Darkken’s Body: Help! Help! Help! Kim Possible! Look out! Kim: Huh? Shego: Rescue's over, Kimmie. Kim: Shego. So not. Cleotis in Darkken’s Body: My mama always taught me to be polite to a lady. Arrrgh! Except when she locks me in a crate. Kim: Run! Ron: All over it! Shego: Don't let Drakken's body get away! Ron: Hai... Aaargh! Kim and Ron: You're me? I'm you? Kim in Ron’s Body: Oh, this is so wrong. This cannot be happening. Ron in Kim’s Body: I told you not to get near the brain switcher. Kim in Ron’s Body: No, you didn't! Ron in Kim’s Body: Well, I was thinking it. Right before my brain got switched! Cleotis in Drakken’s Body: Y'all think we ought to get it in gear? Kim in Ron’s Body: We have to change back. Ron in Kim’s Body: No time! Shego: Hah! You think I can just let you stroll out with Drakken's body? Kim in Ron’s Body: Don't even mess with me. Shego: You... You got hit by Drakken's machine and you two switched. Oh, this is just too great. Oh! You say something. Come on. Ron in Kim’s Body: Bye-bye. Shego: Don't let them get to the...elevator. Cleotis in Drakken’s Body: This sure is mighty tasty chow, ma'am. Mr. Dr P: I'm sorry, I just can't eat sitting across the table from Kimmie’s arch nemesis. Kim in Ron’s Body: Dad, I told you, it's not really Dr. Drakken. Just his body. Mrs. Dr P: I hear you, honey, but as a board-certified neurosurgeon, I got to say it's just not possible to swap brains. Ron in Kim’s Body: Point taken, Dr. P., but how else do you explain my bare midriff? Kim in Ron’s Body: Grrrrr! Mr. Dr P: Chasing bad guys, switching brains, high school sure has changed since my day. Jim: I wanna switch brains with you. Tim: Who would know the difference? Jim: That's the idea. Tim: Cool! Ron in Kim’s Body: What you got, Wade? Wade: Let me talk to Kim. Ron in Kim’s Body: Who do I look like? Wade: Nice try, brain-switch boy. Kim in Ron’s Body: Give me that! Wade: There's been a security breach at Private Dobbs's post. Ron in Kim’s Body: Drakken. Wade: Something been stolen. Something big. Something top secret. Cleotis in Drakken’s Body: Jumpin' catfish... the neutronalizer! Y'all weren't supposed to hear that. Mr. Dr P: Uh, this isn't one of those "I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you" deals, is it? Cleotis in Drakken’s Body: Well,... er, y'all been real nice. Just forget I ever said neutra... Oh, there I go again. Wade: More bad news. My scan shows that Drakken's lair's been abandoned. Everything's gone, including the brain-switch machine. Kim in Ron’s Body: So we're stuck like this? Ron in Kim’s Body: Alright! I'm gonna be popular! Mr. Dr P: You kids. Drakken In Cleotis’s Body: Careful around the neutronalizer. You have no idea what I had to go through to get that. That was marked "fragile"! Thanks to Kim Possible I had to move my lair. Again. Shego: There's nothing wrong with this time-share. Delivery Guy: Yo, chief! Where do you want this brain-switch machine? Drakken In Cleotis’s Body: Oh, er, put it in the den. Carefully! Hello? No, this is not Professor Dementor. He moved. Wait. I didn't notice my body come in. Scarred face, wild-eyed glare. Delivery Guy: Didn't see it. All I know, the truck's empty. Drakken In Cleotis’s Body: Shego?! Shego: Heh-heh. She took it, OK?! Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: You let Kim Possible destroy my lair and take my body?! Shego: You know, this body's kinda cute when you're angry. Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: I want my body. Wade: I'll kick the scanners into overdrive. Kim in Ron’s Body: In the meantime Private Dobbs can stay here for safekeeping. Wade: What will you and Ron do? Kim in Ron’s Body: Until you find Drakken and his machine, we'll just have to deal. Kim in Ron’s Body: What are you doing? Ron in Kim’s Body: Your hair, it's so flippy. Kim in Ron’s Body: Wade, hurry! And then shift your weight from your left foot to your right foot and hit a heel stretch at the toe. That's the routine. Got it? Ron in Kim’s Body: Yeah. Kim in Ron’s Body: Can you do it? Ron in Kim’s Body: No way. Kim in Ron’s Body: Ron, this is the regional’s! The whole squad is depending on me. Er... you. Ron in Kim’s Body: That's major pressure. Kim in Ron’s Body: Yeah, no duh! Ron in Kim’s Body: Think I'm getting the hang of this. And I dig this wardrobe. The breeze is quite refreshing. Kim in Ron’s Body: Er, yeah, let's get some... what would you call it? Lunchage? Ron in Kim’s Body: Snackage, Kim. Snackage, never lunchage. That sounds just stupid. Kim in Ron’s Body: Hey, you can't do that! Boy: What did you say?! Kim in Ron’s Body: Um... um... er... Bully#1:[b/] Hold it, Stoppable. You know, you can't come this way.
[b]Bully#2: Yeah, D-hall's been declared a loser-free zone. Loser free! Bully#1: You forgetting something? My money. Kim in Ron’s Body: What money? Bully#2: You sound funnier than usual, Stoppable. Kim in Ron’s Body: Um, um,... puberty. Kim in Ron’s Body: Aargh! Kim in Ron’s Body: Hi, Bonnie. Bonnie: You little freako. Kim in Ron’s Body: Ow! Girl: Hi, Kim. Ron in Kim’s Body: Can of corn. Girl#2: Kim, we need you to decide on a font for the cover. Ron in Kim’s Body: Er... Girl#2: You're the only one we trust to make a decision everyone can love with. Teacher#1: Kim, are you all prepared for tutoring at Middleton middle school next week? Ron in Kim’s Body: Huh? Teacher#2: Don't forget those banners you promised to paint, Possible. Deadline's Monday. Bonnie: Kim, you are gonna do something about your hair and make-up before the regional’s Girl#2: What about the font?! Teacher#1: The tutoring? Teacher#2: The banners? Teacher#1: Kim? Teacher#2: Kim? Bonnie: Kim? Girl#2: Kim? All: Kim? Kim? Kim? Kim? Ron in Kim’s Body: Tell me Wade found Drakken. Kim in Ron’s Body: Oh! Problems? Ron in Kim’s Body: Not really. No. No. I mean, how hard is it to be popular? You? Kim in Ron’s Body: None. I wallowed in the low expectations. Ron in Kim’s Body: Good. Kim in Ron’s Body: Alright then! Bonnie: Kim, come on, let's go. Tara: East Side is so history! Kim in Ron’s Body: I am so history. Announcer: Hello and welcome to this year's Regional Cheer Final. Kim in Ron’s Body: Wade, anything? Wade: Sorry, Kim. Nothing on Drakken since you called one minute ago. Kim in Ron’s Body: Keep me posted. Wade: You'll be the first. Announcer: First up, your own Middleton High Cheerleaders. You go, girls! Rufus: Hoo! Bonnie: Move! Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: Time to deliver my ultimatum. And just what is so funny? Shego: Your voice, that body, it's not exactly the stuff of ultimatums. Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: Hmmm, very well. Declare me supreme ruler of Earth or I will neutronalise a
different major city every hour on the hour. That should do it. Shego: What does neutronalize mean anyway? Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: I have no idea, but the military had it. It was top secret, that's good enough for me. Wade: Got em’. Drakken did an excellent job covering his tracks, but he wanted his mail forwarded. The change of address shows him in some kind of time-share lair complex... suite 7B. Ron in Kim’s Body: Oh, yeah, like he's just gonna leave the back door open. Kim in Ron’s Body: Over there. Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: Oh! Issuing an ultimatum isn't what it used to be. Give
the world a deadline and what do you get? Nothing. Nada. Zip. Shego: Gee, you think it had something to do with the puppet? Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: Rarrrg! They say Paris is lovely this time of year. Well, not any
more. Enter coordinates! Kim in Ron’s Body: We've gotta move fast. Ron and I will draw Drakken and
Shego away, then you disarm the neutronalizer. Ron in Kim’s Body: How come I finally get the chance to be you and I still end up the distraction? Cleotis in Drakken’s Body: Um, Ms. Possible, I don't know the first thing about disarming the neutronalizer. I just guarded it. Kim in Ron’s Body: OK, new plan.
[Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: No new plans! You're finished, Kim Possible. Ron in Kim’s Body: (pretending to be Kim) But I'm Kim. Finish me! Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: Oh, please! I know all about your little switcheroo-buffoonish sidekick. Kim in Ron’s Body: Don't insult him, he's got it hard enough. Trust me. Ron in Kim’s Body: Me? You should try going through a day as Kim. The pressure's intense. Drakken in Cleotis’s Body: What does this have to do with anything? Finish them both. Ron in Kim’s Body: Wow, gimme a break here, I'm wearing a skirt! Kim in Ron’s Body: Now you know what it's like! Drakken: I want my body. Cleotis in Darkken’s Body: Y'all can have it. It's ugly and it itches something fierce. Shego: I got him! Her! I... whatever! I got him! Drakken: Argh, there's no body like my body. Cleotis: Oh, yes, sir, it's good to be home. Henchman:[b] Alright, let go.
[b]Drakken: Shego, initiate neutronalizer firing sequence! Shego: I don't think so. Drakken: What? Shego: Your brain thing blew out the power. Smooth move. Drakken: Cheap rental lair! They know that I have excessive power
demands. Kim can't talk right now. Can I take a message? Wade: Tell her the Army is on the way. Drakken: The Army? Well, that's just dandy. Shego, activate the automatic self-destruct mechanism. Shego: With pleasure. Computer: Lair Self-Destruct initiated. Kim in Ron’s Body: You can't just destroy this place. Drakken: So I lose the security deposit. It's worth it. Ron in Kim’s Body: It'll blow up the brain switcher We'll never get back to normal. Kim in Ron’s Body: Ron, we'll be blown up, too. Ron in Kim’s Body: Aw, man! Drakken: Farewell, Kim Possible. Computer: The lair will self-destruct in 60 seconds. Ron in Kim’s Body: We're doomed! Cleotis: No, we ain't. Kim in Ron’s Body: Wade, we have no power a very little time. Thoughts? Wade: The tri-lithium core I designed through the communicator packs a punch. Ron in Kim’s Body: There's no way that little thing has enough power. Kim in Ron’s Body: It's our only hope. Computer: The lair will self-destruct in 30 seconds. Kim: It worked! I'm me again. Ron in Rufus’ Body: Er, guys, we have a problem. Rufus: Big problem! Computer: ...self-destruct in ten, nine... Ron: Buddy! Computer: ...two, one. Cleotis: Best be getting out of here! Ron: Good news, we're all back in our bods. Bad news, I think we neutronalized the neutronalizer. Kim: Or not. Cleotis: Did I neglect to mention that the neutronalizer is dang near indestructible? Ron: I know someone like that. Kim: Back at ya, brain-switch boy. Kim: It feels great to be myself again. Ron: I could not take another day of... Bully#1: Hey, Stoppable! Ron: Oh, no is this D-hall? Bully#1: Dude, here's that money I've been, er, holding for you since kindergarten. Bully#2: Hey, got this new video game. Enjoy! Ron: What just happened? Kim: While I was still in your body, I went back to D Hall. Gave some sensitivity training. No big.
